Monday, February 27, 2012

President Paternoster discusses emigrating to America

I had the shock of my life a few weeks ago when one of my Elders Quorum Presidents Patrick O’Brien told me in an interview that he was seriously considering accepting a lucrative offer from his company to go to California, which is in America.  He explained that the head office is right next to a beautiful beach and that he could buy a home in a very nice neighbourhood close by.

The O’Brien’s are from a small branch and to lose a solid family like them would be a great hardship on the other members. Sister O’Brien is the Young Women’s President and their children make up half of the primary.  As an experienced Church leader I knew just what to do. 

I asked Brother O’Brien if he had considered the Church policy related to this matter.  He replied that he didn’t know the Church had a policy on whether he should take a job transfer to America and wasn’t even sure that the Church should be trying to influence his decision one way or the other. 

I was able to explain that the policies the Church has in place are for our own good and well being; they have been written by prophets, seers and revelators according to the spirit of the Lord that is in them and we would do well to heed their counsel. 

We logged onto to read the inspiring policy that the Lord has put in place for the edification of mankind.  I asked Brother O’Brien to prayerfully consider the section entitled “Emigration of Members” which is summarized below:

*“Members are encouraged to remain in their native lands to build up and strengthen the Church.  As members remain in their homelands and work to build the Church there, great blessings will come to them personally and to the Church.  Stakes and wards throughout the world will be strengthened, making it possible to share the blessings of the gospel with an even greater number of Heavenly Father’s children.”

Critics will probably say that the Church is simply trying to look after its own interests but they fail to understand that our ways are not the Lord's ways, nor are our thoughts his.  I asked Brother O’Brien to fast and pray about whether he and his family would be better off heeding the advice of the Brethren by staying in Ireland to partake of the great blessings that the Brethren have promised to them.  I further explained as per the manual that the Brethren have been kind and thoughtful enough to warn that “... those who emigrate often encounter language, cultural, and economic challenges, resulting in disappointment...”

I related to him how often in America we have to say things 17 times before being properly understood and how the culture is so very different from ours. 
Three days later Brother O’Brien rang me to confirm that he had turned down the offer and that his co-worker (who is Presbyterian) will be going to work and live by the beach in California instead.  He said to me “I bet the Presbyterian Church doesn’t even have an emigration policy” and I answered “Well Brother O'Brien, that’s just one of the many great advantages of being in the one true Church!”


Anonymous said...

Please help me overcome my addiction of self-pollution. It manifests itself in psychological terms, usually inducing me to write things like the text below.

Please forgive me, a heinous sinner


This is NOT a website sanctioned by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Nor is "President Paternoster" a stake president within the Church. Rather, this site is farce, and [usually] not good farce, at that.

Most of the posts here are written by quasi-apostates who mock those who are sincerely striving, albeit imperfectly, to follow Jesus.

Caveat utilitor.

Insana D said...

Oh President Paternoster, you've done it again!! Every time I think that the LDS church might someday become archaic, obsolete, superfluous, silly and self serving you show how it is always ahead of the curve, always on top of every important issue and knows what is best for each and every member and their families.

It's so wonderful that the great leaders would put forth such detailed and exacting counsel so as to keep the members from stepping out of their ruts and thinking that they could achieve a grander status or comforts in life than are presently given them. Sometimes it takes that kind of leadership to help people remember the humble circumstances that keep them faithful.

Who knows what horrors might befall his family if they went to a godless heathen enclave like California where wanton whoredoms, nudity, warmth, and even loose morals are so common?

His wife might find that she could acquire a taste for healthy food and exercise and then want to improve herself. His children might meet children of other faiths and cultures and start to think that there might be new ways to approach age old problems, or even to consider thinking completely on their own. I shudder to think of the consequences.

NO, it is better that people stay put, that they don't dream beyond that which God intends for them or even try to visit places outside the comfortable old shoe surroundings of their rainy grey stone cottages and brick courtyards.

Here's a video of what could happen if a person from England, Ireland, Wales, or Scotland were to venture to the U.S.. This is not appropriate for young people so watch only in the dark confines of your own closet:

Holy the Ghost said...

Dear Brother Anonymous (first commentator)
There is a clear and obvious distinction between mocking and good natured ribbing.
...except to those with a persecution complex

TGD said...

I don't understand why people are getting all bent out of shape over this. The LDS church clearly has a policy on this issue and if one is a true follower of Christ, they would also be a member of His one true church and heed the inspiration of its leaders. I don't understand why the Anonymous poster is feeling insecure about the truths presented here.

Anonymous said...

Brother Holy and Brother/Sister TGD

You may notice that I appended a brief blurb before copying and pasting a comment that Brother "Caveat" would usually make.

I think he does this as he does this since he does not understand the true order of blogging.

I was trying to beat him to the FIRST post. Perhaps my "ribbing" of him might be construed by some as "mocking".

I will let you decide the intent of my heart. Perhaps President Paternoster, with his superior intellect and spiritual discernment will know my deepest sentiments in regard to this matter.

It was me, Brother ersatz "Anonomous" making the comment, not the real brother "Caveat".

I am guilty of plagiarism, and apparently, not being very funny.

At least I have helped you avoid loud laughter.

Anonymous said...


This is NOT a website sanctioned by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Nor is "President Paternoster" a stake president within the Church. Rather, this site is farce, and [usually] not good farce, at that.

Most of the posts here are written by quasi-apostates who mock those who are sincerely striving, albeit imperfectly, to follow Jesus.

Caveat utilitor.

WWN said...

It is always wiser to put such personal decisions into the hands of one’s bishop or stake president, rather than to trust our own judgment. Our Church leaders' counsel naturally outweighs any thoughts we may consider or personal revelation we may receive about our alternatives.

Anonymous said...

Thus saith the MOrmon Gods: filthy unvaliant N*ggers shall not receive an inheritance in mine house. Cain was a murderer and the seed of cain shall be cursed and receive an infinite punishment for i am a vengeful SOB saith the Big Man/Lord of Hosts.

If heathens and gentiles struggle with this hard doctrine - so be it.

What is black remains black
Or as the Book of Mormon says "Dark, loathsome and filthy, full of idleness and subtlety"
In the name of BKKK, Amen.

Anonymous said...

This free online documentary explains the origins of the marvellous Book of Abraham:

(also see

THanks Pres Paternoster for reminding us of the Lords Way - racial prejudice, separation and hate.

James Mitchell said...

I'm so grateful that whatever we want to do in life, the Church has an opinion about it and will tell you what to do.

It's almost exactly like the plan of Satan, except in a good way.

Anonymous said...

President Pasternoster,

You're the example of the Church and once again, your words strengthen my faith. Local people should be taught my local missionaries and local leadership. Immigration is such a terrible problem in America and people should follow your words!

Anonymous said...

I believe we should stop the immigration of spirits from the planets surrounding the star Kolob. There are enough children of Father Elohim here already. Just look at the traffic!

The spirits should stay on their own original planets and spread the gospel there. Look at how poorly Elohim did at keeping his own children on the straight and narrow in the pre-existence. He obviously needs help.

And if Elohim would just use a little spirit birth control the pressure on planetary borders could be greatly lessened.

As usual, I agree with the inspired words of President Paternoster and Church President, Even Monson.

Still Born Again Spirit

Cindy said...

I for one am glad for this council. I think it is important for us to stay in our own homelands. When this man returns home to his maker what is going to count the most, that he made more money and got to live on a beach or that he was able to be a servant in bringing up the kingdom of heaven on earth?

Anonymous said...

I think this is good policy. I am originally from Provo, Utah and I had the opportunity to serve a mission in the Denver Colorado South Mission.

While there, my companion and I tracted upon a small village of native Coloradans. What a wonderful, humble people! They were very hardworking, giving and kind. They fed us their amazing local food dish called "PISA-PAWKETS" which consisted of a deep fried pastry filled with meats and cheeses. Yummy!

Anyways, I finally wrote home and asked my parents if we could sponsor this village and help these Coloradans emigrate to Utah. They had saved their monies for years and still didn't have enough money to buy bus tickets to the land of Zion.

I told my parents that these Coloradans wanted what every Utahn already had in Zion--mainly a house with a large unfinished basement; unlimited access to fry sauce at the Chuck-o-rama; local musicians such as Alex Boyet to listen to at "Just for Women" conference, and great shopping such as Mr. Mac, Deseret Books and Nu Skin. Truly Utah County is a "choice county above all other counties"

My parents worried that sponsoring a village of Coloradans could be very costly. They told me the advice from the Church Handbook and I decided to not adopt the village of Coloradans.

They have decided to stay in their native land for now and are building up the church as instructed.